Living My Lies
by DanniHavok
Summary: Set after Tony is hit by the bus in the last episode of the first series. It's been three months since the accident and Tony is back with Michelle but feels he's missing something, could it be a certain blond haired dancer. Tony/Maxxie SLASH!
1. Chapter 1

I love skins and am a die hard Tony/Maxxie fan so this is mostly that pairing and Tony/Spence (that guy that Effy got together with in her episode) also some Tony/Josh and Sid/Cassie so enjoy! Spoilers – all series 1

xXxMichellexXx

He told me he loved me then the line went funny and I lost connection, I had thought he'd hung up on me and I couldn't figure out why he would have done that. So I had went outside of the building that Anwar was having his birthday party in and stood in the cold trying to get hold of him again. At one point Sid came out of the party and I remember thinking, when did he get to the party I could have done with his company earlier, I had then shouted after him asking him if he'd come with Tony but he was to far away to hear me or he was ignoring me. I had stood outside leaning casually against the wall for another 10 minutes when I heard screams and they were getting closer. I turned to the side and saw Effy running towards me blood splattered on her school skirt, tears streaming down her face and a terrified look in her eyes. She had ran into my waiting arms and broke down screaming that he wasn't moving and that she didn't want him to die. I remember my world crashing around me when I realised who she meant and I ran with her back to Tony lying by the side of the pavement blood running down his chin and as white as a ghost. He couldn't be dead I couldn't live with out him!

-- Tony --

I think I love Michelle I really do and I missed her so much. That's why I told her I loved her, that's why I stood out in the middle of a road to get a good signal just so that I could tell her she was the one. Then that fucking bus had to come along and hit me. I just remember feeling like something had smacked the whole front of my body and then I was flying through the air only to come into contact with the hard concrete. As soon as I hit the ground I felt my legs and my left arm break and I tried to scream but when I opened my mouth nothing came out. The world was going black and I couldn't hear anything it was fucking scary and I wanted to cry but I felt like I didn't have the energy to. So instead I closed my eyes and knew I was dying, but the pain never dulled and I remember thinking I didn't wanna die in pain. But just before I passed out I heard a little voice in my head say 'you deserve it you wanker.' And you know it was true.

..?..Sid..?..

I left the party watching all my friends with partners looking happy, Jal with Kenneth (weird but whatever), Maxxie with some big guy and Anwar with a girl who I didn't know. That just reminded me of Cass and how I'd probably missed my chance with her forever. How could I have been such a fucking idiot? She was there the whole time but I was either to busy lusting after Michelle or licking my wounds that Tony had given me to notice her. I had heard Michelle shout me as I left but I didn't feel like talking to anyone so I pretended not to hear her. I didn't feel like going home so I decided to go to the bench that Cassie had tried to commit suicide on and drown myself in my own misery. When I was sitting on the bus I felt my phone vibrate and I looked to see who it was, Michelle, I didn't answer. When I had got to the bench I got the nicest surprise, Cassie sitting there watching the sun rise onto Bristol. I had sat next to her and she took my hand saying a simple "hi" I had returned it and then we sat in silence. She had finally started a conversation about the beauty of the sun and I had listened intently just enjoying her excitement over the simplest thing. My phone rang another 3 times and Cassie smiled every time I ignored it. But after the 5th time she told me I could answer it so I did just to tell Michelle to piss off (because I knew it would be her). Of course when I answered it before I could speak I heard that she was crying. I had asked her why she was upset and she had screamed down the phone that Tony had been hit by a bus and was being rushed to hospital. The phone had slipped through my fingers and crashed on the bench but I could still hear Michelle shouting my name. Cassie then picked up my phone and closed it and slipped it back into my pocket. She had whispered "no more interruptions" and kissed my neck but all I could think about was Tony. I told her what Michelle had told me and that I had to go and her face fell. She had argued that Michelle was with him so he'd be fine but I was adamant telling her he was my best mate and that I couldn't just leave it. She had given in and let me leave and then I was running to the hospital.

)Cassie)

Fucking Tony Stonem! Always stealing Sid from me when I had him all to myself! This had to stop, I had hoped that the bus would finish him off but no Sid had called me a couple of hours later just to told me he had had bad internal bleeding but they had managed to stop it and clean him up, woopty-fucking-do! He also told me that he had broken both his legs and his arm that had helped me smile; I know I sound horrible but I really hated that boy and I'd make Sid see how pointless Tony's existence was even if I had to play dirty.

How's that for a first chap?? Reviews are loved….Danni


	2. 2: Betrayal and Lies

-- _Tony_ --

It's been 3 month since the accident, 2months lying in hospital and a month of lying in my bed, of Michelle coming round everyday, of missing the outdoors and strangely enough missing Maxxie. I couldn't figure out why but for some reason the blonde shorty wouldn't leave my thoughts alone, I mean they weren't sexual thoughts they were more like: 'I wonder if Max is doing alright' or 'I wonder if me and Max are still friends cause he hasn't been round to visit'. That was something that upset me as well it seemed the only person who cared to visit me was Michelle. Sid had visited me once and had kept getting phone calls from Cassie (who he bragged was his girlfriend and that he'd found love and sex) so after about half an hour I excused him and he couldn't get out my room quick enough. Chris had come round with Jal one time as well, shortly after I got out of the hospital. Chris rambled on about college, fucking Angie, parties, fucking Angie, a new dealer and fucking Angie. Jal on the other hand asked me if I was feeling any better and when I had said no she simply nodded and didn't speak for the next two hours that Chris did. As for Maxxie and Anwar they hadn't even asked for me.

So here I was sitting in my bed with Michelle next to me as usual and as she talked about what she'd done that day I sat and thought about Maxxie. I couldn't ask Michelle about him either because I got the feeling that after Russia she pretended he didn't exist. I can understand why of course, I mean if I were her and I saw my boyfriend sucking off our gay friend I wouldn't wanna talk to him either, but then again I wouldn't really wanna talk to my so called boyfriend again either. I still don't quite understand why she took me back, I guess it's because I told her I loved her and that she was the one but still I fucked her around so much was she really that forgiving?

"Are you listening to me?" Michelle giggled as she nudged my in the side.

"Huh?" I said coming back to the earth.

She laughed "it doesn't matter Tony, you were miles away."

I nodded in agreement and decided to ask her about Maxxie just to check if my suspicions were right. "So do you see much of Max or Anwar?" I said casually.

Michelle's smile faltered "no why do you ask?"

"Just curious you know, I mean neither of them has come to see me and you never mention them…" I trailed off when I noticed that her face had gone stony.

"Do you want Maxxie to visit you?" she said bitterly.

"Ummm"

"You do don't you? Well you'll have a hard time getting him here he hates you after what happened bet- in Russia" I noticed she faulted and I knew she had stopped herself from saying something like 'between the two of you'.

"Oh" was all I could manage. He hated me, but I didn't get it he had told me in the airport when we were leaving Russia that it was alright and that he didn't want to loss me as a mate. Then he had let me get all touchy feely with him on the green when he was on his skateboard and we had shared a joint, he even looked like he had wanted me there and then. It didn't make any sense why did he hate me all of a sudden.

"Look Tony I gotta go my mum will probably be wondering were I am. See you later yeah." That last part wasn't so much of a question but a fact because even though she was pissed at me now she'd be back tomorrow.

"Yeah, yeah I'll see you tomorrow" I said sounding miles away for the second time of this Michelle session. Then she was gone making sure she slammed my bedroom door as she left.

_Jal_

Fucking hell why am I here again? Why am I getting to involved in other peoples problems yet again?! I looked up at Tony's bedroom window and let out a heavy sigh. This seemed to give me the courage to walk up his path and knock on his door; I only waited a minute or so before Effy answered. "Hey Effy can I go up and see Tony?"

She nodded "yeah sure." She had started talking after Tony's accident and even though that had been ages ago it was still weird to hear her speak.

I smiled at her and walked in and up the stairs to Tony's bedroom. I knocked on the door and hear Tony say "come in Michelle." I opened the door and he looked slightly confused "oh hey Jal sorry I thought you-"

"I know who you thought I was Tony, I'm gonna keep you company today" he stared at me blankly "I told Michelle to take a day off give you someone different."

He nodded then smiled "cool so how are you then?"

"I'm alright I'm guessing you're still pretty shit though?"

"Yeah" he laughed lightly "I feel useless and that's cause I fucking am."

I smiled then remembered why I was here and decided to get straight down to business "listen Tony I didn't only come to give Michelle a break I also came to answer your question" he looked at me blankly again "about why Maxxie hasn't been around."

A sad look entered his eyes "oh, it's alright Jal, Michelle told me" he sounded really upset and for once I felt sympathy for him.

"No Tony you don't understand Shell-"

"I get it he hates me I don't know why since he told me he didn't wanna loss me as a mate but whatev-"

"Tony! Maxxie doesn't hate you!" I said hurriedly and loudly.

Tony looked me in the eyes "but Michelle said-"

I shook my head "Michelle said that because she still doesn't talk to Maxxie and her view about him being a slut hasn't changed either" I stopped to let that be absorbed before I continued "she doesn't want Maxxie talking to you so she told him that you think he's a filthy perv and lots of other really nasty shit like that, but he doesn't hate you he's just crushed because he thinks he's lost you over what happened in Russia."

Tony's face was blank as he listened but when I finished his face became contorted with rage. "What a scheming evil two faced cow!" he yelled then he turned on me "have you told Maxxie she's lying? Does he know she's just a sad bitch?" I hung my head. I hadn't took Maxxie because I was suppose to be Shell's mate and I was only telling Tony now because she had told me that Tony had asked about him and it showed that he did still wanted Max as a mate. "Fucking hell Jal! Why haven't you told him? I don't want to loss Max" he wasn't yelling at me it was just his way of realising anger. Then he whispered "I want him to be here, I can't stop thinking about him."

I looked at Tony slightly shocked "you don't fancy him do you??"

"No….I don't know" he sounded genuinely confused. He banged his head on his headboard in frustration and I noticed a tear run down his face. Now I'm not one for feeling sorry for Tony Stonem but even now I found myself sitting on his bed and grabbing his hand to comfort him. He squeezed it as he tried to hide how upset he was and we sat in silence.

About half an hour past before Tony finally said "I'm gonna dump her and I'm gonna talk to Maxxie as soon as I'm back at college." His voice shook as he spoke but he sounded completely sure he was doing the right thing. I nodded silently and he turned to me with a small slightly shy smile "thanks Jal I know your Michelle's best friend and you've never really liked me but thanks for telling me."

I smiled back "its alright Tony" I let go of Tony's hand and continued "well I'll leave you to get some sleep see you soon ok."

I went to get up from his bed but he stopped me "you can stay if you want if you're not busy I mean its not like I'm doing anything" he laughed and I turned grinning.

"Ok then why not I'm sure my dad wont miss me for another hour." So we spoke about college, how people had been, gossip and of course Maxxie. I left three hours later and was reluctant to go.

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you know the score ppl R&R...Danni xxxxxx 


	3. 3: Revenge follows Bullying

oOo_Maxxie_oOo

"You're thinking about him again aren't you?"

"Huh?" was my reply. I had heard Anwar but I was to far away to let it register into my brain.

"I said you're thinking about Tony again aren't you?" he looked worried and had sad eyes. I nodded bowing my head "oh come on Max he called you a perv and worse! He's a wanker and he's not worth it. Cheer up, please" he added one of his huge cheesy grins at the end and I laughed gently.

"I just don't get it that's all, I told him I was fine with him and that I didn't wanna loss him as a mate and he said the same he even teased me about letting him another shot at a blowjob so why did he say it?"

I noticed Anwar wince slightly at the idea of Tony giving me a blowjob because he may understand me being gay but he didn't wanna heard about it "Maybe he only said it to keep Michelle off his back, I mean he's got a lot of making up to do so maybe he thought he had to convince her that he hated you and that he wouldn't go anywhere near you again" Anwar said logically. It did make sense of course but it still hurt that he said it. Anwar noticed I still looked lost and miserable, he sighed "fucking hell Maxxie why don't you text him then if it's bothering you this much."

"But I thought you said that was a bad idea" I said moodily.

"I know I did but if its bothering you that much just talk to him" Anwar said in a soothing tone.

I thought about it for a minute or two then said "ok I'll do it now," feeling slightly better. I took out my phone and started out on my text. After about five attempts to write the right thing I finally settled for:

'Tony Michelle told me that u think I'm a perv but I don't understand y when u were ok with me after Russia n if u do think I'm a perv what changed ur mind plz txt bck Max'.

I showed it to Anwar who said it was ok and then I sent it. I then noticed the time and the fact that we were gonna be late for history, damn it! "Anwar move it we're gonna be late and you know what Tom's like." We had been sitting in the college green and our classroom was on the other end of the building. As we stood I realised I didn't have my history folder, great just great it was in my locker. "Look Ann I need to get my stuff from my locker I'll catch you up ok?" He nodded and we ran in separate directions.

When I got to my locker I found something I didn't expect, the word 'slut' was scrolled over my locker in red spray paint. I looked at it in shock and then I realised who probably done it, Michelle. Since she had got back with Tony she had went out of her way to make my life miserable, she had made comments about me in class, had turned most of the boys against me saying that none of them were safe from the 'dirty little slut'. But worst off all I had actually been sexually assaulted by one of the gay students, he had come at me in the boys shower room, slammed me against the walls, saying that it was what the 'slut' wanted then he'd taken off my towel and well I'm sure you can guess what he had then tried to do. I had never been so frightened in my life, but I was lucky because my screams had been heard by Anwar and Chris, who had been looking for me, they had come to my rescue. But I wouldn't tell anyone and made them promise that they wouldn't say anything either. And now there was this, now I really was the college slut she had made sure everyone knew where I keep my stuff that this locker belonged too the disgusting gay slut. I felt tears welling up in my eyes as I walked towards my locker. The only reason she was doing this to me was just to torment me about the fact that Tony had picked her over me. I wiped my eyes then took out my locker key but as I went to unlock it I noticed the door was ajar. She'd been through my stuff as well, fan-fucking-tastic. I opened it expecting all my stuff to be ripped to shreds but it all looked ok, so I took out my history folder closed my locker and locked it again (she must off picked at the lock cause it was still working).

I ran to history and got a 'telling off' by Tom for being late. I noticed Michelle smirking at me evilly. I took my seat next to Anwar and Sid, that's when my phone vibrated against my leg. I gulped and took it out my pocket I flipped it open and it told me; 1 new message – Tony. I opened it, read it and felt a huge grin spread across my face.

'Hey Max I don't think ur a perv it was that bitch Michelle! She made it up she told me u h8d me n I realised how much I like u I don't no if I fancy u but I deff don't wanna loss u!! Txt bck Tony xx p.s. I'm dumping that dozy bitch 2day u can cum by l8r if u want )

I could have jumped up onto my desk and preformed last years tap routine whilst sticking my middle fingers up at Michelle at the same time. "What you grinning at?" Sid asked me curiously.

"Nothing" I beamed and opened my history folder. That's when my happy mood disappeared; most of my work had red spray paint all over it hiding all my hard work. Why most of my work and not all of it? Because she had only ruined my work on Russia. I looked at her and her smirk widened, I felt like crying or punching her. Then I remembered what Tony had just told me and I smiled back at her triumphantly. This obviously confused her because her smile disappeared as I turned away. I wrote Tony a simple text back saying:

'Tony u hav no idea how happy u'v made me I'll deff cum round l8r Max xxxxx'

..?.._Sid_..?..

I looked down at Maxxie's destroyed work and I could have killed Michelle, when had she become such a bitter cow? She was making Max's life a waking nightmare and she genuinely didn't care. I watched Maxxie look at Michelle who looked like the cat with cream whilst Max looked like he's was gonna cry. But then he smiled back at her and turned round again so that he could focus on his phone. He fiddled around with it for a minute (maybe sending a text) then put it back in his pocket. He then tried to sort through his work and separate the stuff he could still use from the destroyed work. Anwar looked and his eyes burned with rage. He turned to face Michelle and shouted "you fucking cow! What's your problem? So Maxxie gave Tony head woopty-fucking-do, he picked you so leave Max alone!!" Then he turned around like nothing had happened.

All the class, including Tom, just gapped at Anwar, who seemed better after his outburst. "Anwar!" Maxxie hissed at him "there is no reason to get upset I don't care, I'm fine its just bits of paper."

Since I was in the middle of them Anwar had to lean over me to whisper back to Max, "yeah but it's the principle Maxxie! You can't keep letting that silly bitch get away with bullying you" Max opened his mouth to protest "don't deny it Max! There is no other word for it she's bullying you!"

"Uh guys could you be quiet please" Tom murmured at them.

"Ann's got a point Max, she's basically torturing you" I joined in ignoring Tom as everyone always does.

Maxxie smiled secretively at us and said "yeah well my torture is about to end."

"How? You finally gonna tell your mum?" I asked.

"No" he snorted, "my mum couldn't give a shit. I'm not gonna tell anybody but I know that come this time tomorrow Michelle wont be so smug anymore."

Anwar let a slow, curious smile spread across his face, "why what do you have in mind?"

Max tipped the edge of his nose, grinned and went back to sorting out his work. His way of saying conversation over. I stared back at the front of the classroom and let my mind wander, I guess I should ask Maxxie what he had in mind, because as much as Michelle is being a bitch I cant deny that I don't want her to get seriously upset. Weird aint it? I hate her for what she's doing to Max, for tormenting him, but when it looks like trouble is coming her way I want to jump to her rescue. I wonder what Cassie would think of that? God talking of Cass she's only Michelle's side even though she hates Tony and Maxxie thought that she liked him.

Tony. I feel shitty about not really talking to him lately I think I'll go see him tonight, tell Cass I'm doing something with my dad. I'm lying to my girlfriend to be with Tony? In a weird way I feel that's gonna be the only way I can hang around with him soon.

* * *

thnx for all the reviews ppl i luv u all!!!! keep R&Ring...Danni 


	4. 4: out with Old and in with the New

AN- hello lovely ppl just to let u no the part in italics is a a flashbck enjoy

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-- Tony --

6 o'clock, Michelle should be here soon and I have to remember not to go mental at her when she comes in. Just play it cool, I hear the front door open and close then Michelle's voice announcing herself. Ok here it comes don't loss your head unless you need to!

"Hey babe" god I need to.

"Don't fucking call me that!" I snarled.

Michelle looked taken aback and confused. "What's wrong? What have I done?" she asked obviously confused but laughing slightly.

"I know what you told Maxxie, I know what you told me he thought of me was a lie and I know that you did because you thought you'd guarantee our relationship if you did. Guess what it's destroyed it!"

She just stared at me for a minute, opened her mouth as if to say something then closed it again. She tried again and managed to say something, "who told you?" she asked quietly looking at my duvet.

"Does it matter" I said trying to bit back a growl.

She then suddenly snapped her head up and I could see tears in her eyes, "you can't honestly say this is it! Come on Tony think about all the times you fucked me around and I always forgave you it's not fa-"

"I'm not you! I won't let anyone fuck me around I loved you Shell, and now…." I trailed of forgetting about my anger.

She went back to staring at my covers but it didn't hide the tears running down her face, "so that's it? We're over?" she whispered sounding broken.

I nodded, "I think we would have just fallen into a pattern of hurting each other if we stay together cause I think I like max," I paused to see her reaction and it was wide eyed astonishment, "and I don't think I'd forgive you for what you've done."

The silence that followed was uncomfortable and embarrassing as I picked at a thread on my t-shirt and Michelle seemed to have been hypnotised by a spot of my duvet. "I should go," she finally said and was gone before I could even look up at her.

oOoMaxxieoOo

God why am I so nervous I'm going to hang with Tony not ask him to become my life partner! I take another look at myself in the full length mirror in my parents room, I was wearing a pair of loose fitting jeans that just showed the top of my boxer briefs, scruffy old trainers and my blue stripy top that I'd wore in Russia when Tony had first kissed me. I pulled at the bottom of it in a daze, I hadn't put this on because of its history I had just seen it and thought 'hey not worn this in a while'. It was only after I had put it on that I remember Russia and had frowned, maybe this wasn't such a good idea.

Stop it! You'll go for like an hour maybe that's all and its just Tony he doesn't bit! I ran a hand through my hair and took another look in the mirror. My hair was standing on its ends and it gave me the impression of an insane man. I flattened it again and left the room and went to my own. I picked up my hat just as I heard my dad shouting me. I bounced down the stairs quickly and entered the kitchen to my dad standing at the open patio door smoking a roll up so my little brother didn't inhale the smoke.

"What were you doing up there?" my dad asked with an eyebrow raised in interest.

"He was prettying himself up for his date," grinned Jake from the kitchen table where he sat eating a sandwich.

"Shut it squirt!" I said playfully ruffling his hair as I passed him to join my father.

He passed me the roll up and I took a long drag, which I guessed steadied my nerves, "were you? You do look like your trying to impress someone."

"How?" I looked down at myself. "I wear this kinda thing all the time," I said indignantly.

"That's your favourite top though and you only wear those jeans when you want someone to be able to pull them down quickly," he grinned wickedly.

I felt myself getting hot in the face and knew that my face would be red very soon, "shut up" I mumbled. My dad laughed and turned to Jake, who was giggling. Not that he'd properly understand what me and dad were talking about, being only 6 and half, but he just liked to laugh along and not be left out.

"So who you going out with?" Jake asked cocking his head to the side looking like a cute puppy.

"None of your business," I said and felt my phone vibrate against my leg. I pulled out and saw on the screen that I'd just received one new message from Tony. God I bet he's cancelling, he probably didn't go through with dumping Michelle, he's probably not changed at all and gonna start fucking me around again. I opened it:

'hey max just thought i'd check u were still cumin 2night i'v just dumped shell which was not fun ( txt bck Tony xxx'

I over react to much, I sighed and text Tony back saying that I'd be round shortly, "that the new boyfriend?" my dad asked innocently.

I put my phone away and punched my dad's arm playfully, "nosy git" I muttered so that Jake wouldn't hear then quickly walked away before my dad could react. I ruffled Jake's hair again to the sound of protest and left the house yelling that I'd make my own dinner when I got back.

-- Tony --

'i'm just leavin i'll b there shortly max xxxxxx'

I looked at the text and all the kisses at the end, I'd put three at the end of my text and he'd replied with six! It probably didn't mean anything but maybe that was a subtle way of telling me he wanted me. I mean I'd always had the hunch that he'd fancied me especially when we first met.

_Anwar had been hanging with a new boy at school, telling us that he was sound guy and that we should meet him. Personally I think he was only telling us this so that he could say that he had a friend that he didn't just hang around with me and Sid. He had a tendency to wander behind us at school and I found it really irritating to have a cling-on at age 12 I wasn't even that cool, well I didn't think so. _

_Anwar told us to meet him at the park at 6 and then we could all go to dinner at his after. I wasn't about to turn down a free meal especially if it was Indian food, even if I did have to meet Anwar's new friend. I met Sid just outside the park at 10 to 6 so that I could have a smoke before meeting Anwar. Sid couldn't understand why I smoked and neither did I really I guess I did because my uncle had offered me one as a joke and hadn't expected me to say yes, stupid git. _

_We entered the park me puffing away at my cigarette while Sid looked at it curiously. When we were getting close to the play park I noticed that Anwar was already there sitting on the swings with a small blond haired boy whose toes just touched the ground. "That must be him," Sid said._

"_So it must," I replied dryly flicking the stub of my fag away. We continued our walk towards the two boys and at one point got waved at madly by Anwar who had noticed us. This made his companion look up and stare at us; it was only till we got closer that I realised he was looking at me in particular._

"_Hi guys, this is Maxxie, you're early." Anwar said cheerily._

"_Yeah like two minutes early," I said simply and walked round him and towards Maxxie. "Tony," I extended my hand and I noticed he looked embarrassed but took my hand all the same. I squeezed it slightly to see what reaction I got, he blushed and mumbled something. "What?"_

_He cleared his throat, "hey I said 'hey'" I nodded and loosened my grip on his hand. He slide his free from mine slowly as though reluctantly and looked at me funny as he stood from his swing. It was then I noticed how short he was, he only came up to my shoulders and gazed up at me with wide eyes. I stared back slightly confused but before I could ask him what he was looking at he broke eye contact and moved towards Anwar, "well you're mum told us not to be late Ann we better get going." He smiled awkwardly while Sid looked confused and Anwar irritated._

_When we got to Anwar's house he was told off by his mother for being late and we had to wait for him up in his bedroom. The three of us sat in silence Sid staring out the window, Maxxie sitting on the bed head bowed and me leaning against the wall trying to think of conversation. "So why did you move her Max?" Sid saves the day, well done._

_Maxxie looked up with a look of surprise, as if he was stunned that someone would actually try to make conversation with him. "Umm well my parents – they thought it- I mean……they thought it would be for the best," and his eyes went back to the floor._

"_You liking the school?" I asked but I got nothing more than a shrug let alone eye contact. Did this guy not like me or something? "Well at least you've made a friend right?" he nodded, god it would be easier to talk to a wall. _

_Then he looked up at me and smiled weekly, "I gotta admit I prefer Anwar to my old friends." A sad look entered his eyes and I was about to ask why when the door slammed open making us all jump._

"_Dinner" grunted Anwar looking highly pissed off. I smiled at his annoyance and heard a giggle behind me. I turned to Maxxie and grinned who blushed back at me, ok?_

_We sat in Anwar's dining room/kitchen and ate our meal with a surprisingly comfortable atmosphere. Anwar and Sid found out they had something in common through our conversation, girls, so as they talked I tried to get Maxxie doing the same. But I might as well have been speaking to mute person because all he done was nod or shake his head. When we'd finished Sid helped Anwar clear up and I seized my opportunity to get Maxxie by myself, maybe then he'll talk to me! _

"_Hey Ann can me and Maxxie go wait up stairs for you and Sid, so we can use your computer?" Anwar who was in deep conversation with Sid nodded and before Maxxie could protest I grabbed his arm and whisked him away. We climbed the stairs and entered Anwar's room, me still holding Maxxie's arm all the way. "Do you not like me or something?" I asked plainly when I'd closed the door and let go of him. _

_He opened his mouth a couple of times, resembling a goldfish, then closed it shut and bowed his head as if in defeat. I was about to ask him what actually I'd done wrong when he said, "I don't hate you that would be to easy."_

"_Huh?" ok so it didn't make me sound like the most intelligent person on the planet but what the hell is that suppose to mean?_

_He rubbed a hand over his eye roughly and I wondered if he was tried to poke his eye out so as to avoid the conversation. "Look Tony I'm not like you or Sid and Anwar, talking about girls and what you'd wanna do to them. I want…" he looked at me pleadingly; as if he was trying to will me understand him so he didn't need to say it, "I want to do things with….with boys!" he said the last word with force as if it took great physical strength to say. _

"_Oh……ok, sooo what's that got to do with you not liking me?" it was only till I said it that I realised how stupid it sounded. I looked him in the eyes and almost saw an apology in his deep blue/grey eyes. "Oh…so do you wanna do things with me?" I asked casually. He bowed his head as if he was ashamed and I walked towards him, "hey look I don't care if you're into boys and I guess I should be flattered that you fancy me, so it's cool yeah?"_

_He looked up at me and smiled weakly, "I don't know many boys who would react like you Tony thanks." I shrugged and smiled and before I knew what was happening he'd pressed his lips to mine. It was odd I'd kissed girls before, but this felt different. Maxxie's lips were chapped and I just stood there with my eyes open wondering what to do. Then it was over and Maxxie looked at me expecting me to say something I guess. "Sorry that was out of no where can I try again?" he sounded hopeful and I couldn't help but shrug again. So he closed the gap between us again I felt his cracked lips connect with mine. This time I closed my eyes and kissed back, just to know how it felt to kiss a boy back and it felt quite good probably just because it was a kiss and kisses always feel great. Maxxie rested his hand on my neck and pulled me closer to him and I felt his tongue push at my lips trying to get into my mouth. _

_I pulled back, "what you doing?" I asked._

"_Kissing you" he said quietly going red. "You said it was ok."_

"_Actually I didn't I shrugged but I'm not talking about that what where you doing with your tongue?"_

"_Haven't you ever kissed with tongues?" I rolled my eyes and told him of course I had. "Then what's the difference?" he had a point, so I nodded and again we went back for the kiss. This time no time was lost I felt Maxxie's tongue on my lips and I opened my mouth to let him explore. Actually I think I preferred this kind of kiss it was more emotional and meant more which was usually good. And this was defiantly good Maxxie was an amazing kisser and I pulled him closer to me. I wasn't gay, I didn't even think I was into boys, but I never wanted to stop kissing Max, his tongue was driving me mad and his chapped lips seemed like the sweetest thing I'd ever had against my own. _

_I heard the bedroom door open but didn't stop it was only when I heard Anwar shout "Maxxie!" that realised we should probably stop. "It's ok Anwar Maxxie's gay we were just kissing" Maxxie giggled and I smirked. _

_But the look on Anwar's face was ugly, "you said you wouldn't go there Max!"_

"_Did you?" I laughed and Maxxie nodding letting go of me, which kinda upset me. _

"_Sorry Anwar-" _

"_Don't be sorry Max! Anwar, Maxxie can kiss whoever he wants and it not like he seduced me or anything." I said annoyed at Anwar's attitude._

"_Humph" was Anwar's only answer and I could feel Maxxie getting embarrassed. Then he spoke and his voice sounded cold, "maybe you and Sid should go Tony I wanna talk to Max."_

_I was about to protest when Maxxie interrupted me, "yeah that's a good idea see ya Tony. Nice to meet you Sid." I looked at him and didn't know whither to kiss him again or smack him! Why was he giving in?_

_I decided anger was more satisfying, "com on Sid!" I snarled and left the room. _

_The walk home was silent until we reached the corner that we would part at and Sid finally spoke. "Tony, why did you kiss Maxxie?"_

_I looked at him like he was stupid, "well why not? And anyway he kissed me," and I turned away from him. _

"_Well I never thought you were gay and even if he kissed you, you looked like you were enjoying it." Sid said carefully obviously not wanting to start an argument. _

"_I'm not gay!" I yelled. _

"_Then why-" _

"_Because he liked me and I thought why not try it" I replied simply._

_He shook his head, "Tony that's not fair on Maxxie! If he likes you and you kiss him he's gonna get really mixed signs."_

"_Oh for Christ sakes Sid it was just a kiss!"_

"_Yeah but he wont see it that way will he!" he said sharply. _

_I was starting to get pissed off so I began to walk away from him, "yeah whatever Sid. I'll see you at school tomorrow" and picked up speed before he could reply. _

Just as I thought about that day I heard a knock on my door and the gorgeous blond head of Maxxie came into view.

* * *

Very VERY long chap hope u like R&R….Danni xxxx


	5. 5: Lust and Loathing

oOoMaxxieoOo

"Hey Tone" I whispered like I was losing my voice.

He smiled, "hey."

Silence. Fuck this is awkward, all I've wanted to do for months now is talk to him and know I'm here I cant. I look at his bed and sit down on the edge of it not looking at him.

"You know what I was thinking about before you came in?" he asked after a long silence and I turned to see him smiling. I shook my head, "us. When I first met you and I thought you didn't like me…but actually you fancied me."

I felt myself blush "oh yeah I remember that." I grinned. "I remember how you wouldn't talk to after and I was totally paranoid that you'd went homophobic on me but you were just annoyed that I didn't sta-" but I never got to finished my sentence. Tony grabbed my top, pulled me on top of him and crashed our lips together. We kiss shamelessly me writhing against his body and feeling his erection against my thigh. Then I heard myself say the most stupid idiotic thing I could possibly say! "I missed you," I mumbled against his lips. There was a sort of panic in my mind as I tried to figure out how to take it back. He'd probably think I was being pathetic or a total queen!

"I missed you to. So fucking much!" and he kissed me again.

xXxMichellexXx

"I can't believe you told him!" I screamed at my so called best friend who was sitting on her bed with a strong defiant look on her face.

"Michelle you were being unreasonable, neither Maxxie or even Tony deserved that. No matter what's happened in the past!" she said calmly but stern at the same time. I just gaped at her, I know that Jal's sensible and she's probably right but it's still unfair, I've just lost my boyfriend to a slut!

"He's a whore! Look at Russia if you need an example!" I'm still screaming and I can tell Jal's running out of patience.

"That, as Maxxie explained countless times, was a mistake-" I opened my mouth to argue "-and I know it doesn't excuse him or Tony. But you know that Maxxie was upset at the time and you also know - more than anyone - that once Tony has an idea in his head he won't leave it until he's went through with it. He made all the advances and Maxxie was wrong to give in. But it's neither of their faults if they ended up liking each other."

'She's making perfect sense' part of me told myself, but I didn't listen. "So not only has he got away with being a slut in Russia, he's now going to get away with stealing my boyfriend!" I hissed.

Jal stood and came right up to my face, "he's not your boyfriend anymore! And what the fuck are you talking about? He's got away with nothing, you've never let him forget Russia and as for stealing Tony away he wanted Maxxie just much as Maxxie wanted him!" Jal screamed at me. I felt my knees buckle at the sheer fury of Jal's rant and I thought I was gonna cry but I bit my tongue to fight back the tears. I instead just glared at her and left so that I could cry in peace in my own room.

It was only until I was on the bus home that I realised something. Maxxie had smiled at me in a smug kinda way in history and I now knew why. He knew! He knew that Tony was going to dump me probably because Jal told him the situation or maybe Tony text him and told him that he wanted him and not me. I was shaking with rage and I just wanted to let out one long loud scream to relieve the anger. That little whore will pay; I don't care if I get Tony back I just want to see him suffer!

..?..Sid..?..

"Yeah I'm sorry Cass but I promised him I'd help him clean the kitchen it's a complete mess," I said looking round at my spotless kitchen whilst on the phone to Cassie.

"Oh" she didn't sound convinced. "Well I could come round and help," she said as though she was waiting for an excuse for her not to.

"Well ummm I think I best just do it with Dad, you know probably get it done quicker." I lied through my teeth.

"Oh" stop saying that! "Well I guess I'll see you tomorrow Sid, say hi to Tony for me will you."

"Will do bye Cass," and I hung up. Wait did I just….oh fuck!

How does she always catch me out like that? "What's up?" my dad asked as he entered the living room and collapsed onto the couch.

"Nothing" I said sounding bewildered. He gave me a weird look but didn't say anything and I left the house trying not to worry about how angry Cassie would be with me later.

The walk to Tony's was long and quiet, I should have got a bus but I'd just missed one by the time I got to the bus stop and I couldn't be bothered sitting about waiting. When I finally did get there Tony's wanker dad answered the door. He glowered at me as he let me and I could feel his death stare on my back as I walked up the stairs. Jim Stonem and myself never really got on even more so after Effy's drug scare a while back before the accident and I had stood up for Tony after his parents had accused him of drugging Effy. I had even looked down at him when he'd gone on about him being Tony's dad and I'd said "I know what you are!" like he was the scum of the earth.

I just walked into Tony's room as I'd never really had to knock before, god I wish I had this time. "Hey Tone you-" but my sentence was lost as saw Tony lying onto of Maxxie, both naked and from the looks of things Maxxie had Tony's cock up his ass. They didn't even notice me as Maxxie had his eyes closed and Tony had his face buried in the crook of Maxxie's neck. The look of Maxxie's face was indescribable all I can say is that he looked like he was boiling over with lust and pleasure. I went pink and left the room, closing the door as quietly as I could. God now I know how Tony felt that time he walked in on me wanking over Michelle.

I stood very close to the door and heard moans and whimpers, groans and strangled yelps. "Oh god Tony I've wanted you for so long!" god Maxxie sounds hoarse it's kinda sexy actually. No stop it Sid! We've been here before it doesn't matter how good looking he is don't fucking go there! As odd as it sounds I did actually go through a very short period of things I wanted Maxxie as more than a friend. The weird thing was that people who have thought I was gay in the past would have thought I was hot for Tony, but I couldn't be. I mean he's my best friend it would be weird and also he wasn't my type. I wanted to be like him (for a time) not shag him. But with Maxxie, he was something different all together; blond, gorgeous, adorable, terrific mover, bright eyes and the softest looking lips I'd ever tasted. I grinned at the last thought then shook my head it had been a drunken kiss that I had given into, the prat that I am.

There's a sharp intake of breath and a low moan from the bedroom and I know that Tony's finished, but I can't really walk in on them now either. I should probably just go home but then I hear Tony speak and the colour drains from my face, "you can come in now Sid." How the fuck did he catch me?

--Tony--

Sid stormed into the room with a determined but pained look on his face looking anywhere but at my bed. God I had to laugh at him sometimes, "hello Tony hello Maxxie."

Maxxie bursts out laughing, "its ok Sid you can look at us we're covered." He said and I brushed my cock against his ass to which he bit his lip to stop a moan escaping. I'd never felt anyone like Maxxie he was so vibrant so fiery and so _so_ tight! Our legs were still tangled together under the covers and I had an arm rested lazily over his middle and even now I was on fire for him.

"Ok so you're like sleeping together now? That's cool that's fine but what about Michelle, Tony?" Sid said seriously.

"I dumped her," I said simply.

"Ok ok that's good…well not good for Chelle but good that you're not cheating." And he smiled slightly.

"Told you that Michelle wouldn't be so smug for much longer," smiled Maxxie and he turned to me with a look of joy in his eyes.

Sid looked confused so I explained, "I text Maxxie today while he was in college and told him that I was gonna dump Chelle and that I'd been thinking about him a lot recently."

"Ahh I see, well I'm happy for you. But you know Michelle will be after your blood now Maxxie and Tony won't be there to stand up to her," he looked at me with a sad frown, "and I think you're the only person she'll listen to."

"Don't worry Sid I'm back to college soon I'm getting my last check up tomorrow and I'll be back after the weekend." I gripped Maxxie as I'd saw the colour fade from his face. He was worried and I swear I'll kill Michelle if she hurts him.

* * *

Soz it's taken a while for this chap, but i'm studying for exams ( anyway here it is R&R...Danni xxx 


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